It has to be said
Paris Hilton is a big fucking crybaby who can't handle the real world.
Normally I don't stoop to commentary on the malfeasances of such cultural black holes. After all, this girl's biggest cultural contribution was to give her boyfriend a blowjob. But this time I have to speak out because this hits close to home.
I spent twelve months interning for the District Attorney in two counties. I've been in court more times than I can count. I've seen tons of lowlifes. Thieves, drug dealers, gang members. But I'll say this about each and every one of them: when they were punished by the strong arm of the law, they did so with honor and dignity.  I have never--never--heard of a defendant who tried to get themselves released because they couldn't handle jail after three days. And I have never seen a defendant break down and scream and cry and literally quivver with anguish upon being sent back. They may be criminals, and some of them may be lowlifes, but every single one of them has more class than Paris Hilton.
Mr. Hilton, you should be ashamed of your daughter. And you should be ashamed of yourself for having raised her so poorly.
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